Have you ever found yourself taking a ride on a particular train of thought that you know you have no business being on? Only you aren’t quite ready or willing to abandon that track?
Maybe that doesn’t ever happen to you but it is exactly where I found myself the other day. I had hopped on board a particular train of thought that was less than edifying. Since I am laying it all out there and being honest, it was downright sinful. The fact that I knew what I needed to do and knowing I didn’t want to do what I ought to do was making me a bit grumpy.
My husband did something that wasn’t necessarily as big a deal as I decided to make it and suddenly I added a new car to the train. Mind you, if I had been on the right train on the right tracks in the first place the little incident would have been nothing more than one of those things that just needed to be covered in love. Instead, I was fussy with myself because I knew I needed to abandon my hobo thought life and get on board with what was true. What was honorable, just, pure and lovely.
And I stayed cranky even while I tried to redirect my thoughts. If I had to wrestle my flesh shouldn’t he? And that thinking added another car to the disaster train. Because I did need to wrestle with my sin and by golly so did everyone around me and why should I forgive or be patient or understanding with them if I couldn’t be with myself? And if they couldn’t see their sin then maybe I needed to put on a conductor hat and drive their train too? Only my kids didn’t see it that way. It just looked like mamma was on a tear.
ThankfullyGod is indeed merciful and reminded me of lessons learned in the past and allowed me to pull the lever and switch tracks. I got off those rickety rail lines of bad attitude and sinful thoughts and was spared a major derailment. The day proceeded much better after I circled back to Rob and confessed my irritability and tossed aside my conductor hat with the kids.
Take home lesson? When we find ourselves track jumping like some kind of derelict hobo we have to remember that we aren’t meant for that particular ride and resist the temptation to stay onboard.
That train doesn’t stop at a station worth visiting.
Sharing with Counting My Blessings and