The other day I had the most surreal experience or rather moment of realization. The stage had already been set I guess by the fact that Rob and I had recently gone away for the weekend and the kids stayed home. Alone. Without even a grandmother to oversee things. We didn’t actually do the same happy dance that we did say, when the last diaper was used or when we told everybody to go get in the van and no one needed help, but there was a quiet celebration when we got back home and everyone had survived without us for a few days. (Apparently we do need to establish some contact protocol in case we do it again though. The kids wrote up a rather hilarious desperately-seeking-parents facebook post when we didn’t communicate with them as much as they felt we needed too.)
Anyway, last week I was doing a quick mini session for a friend and Emily was sending me text of things she was designing on the computer. She is seriously considering a graphic design college path and it was fun to see her creating and working on something. When I got home Abby wanted to talk pictures with me and we went through some of her recent photographs and talked shop so to speak. She is showing a lot of interest in photography and some talent and skill. Sarah is happy and content with her life and working so hard towards her nursing degree. Sam is working hard as the church janitor and learning to be responsible for a job and tithing and other grown up stuff not centered around LEGOS or the latest episode of America’s Got Talent (although both things are still very important to him.) Claire is busy and active and into everything…playing with friends, volleyball camp, reading and puzzles, and painting sun catchers.
We’ve spent summer so far in and out of the kitchen baking and cooking and trying new things. We’re doing new things like leaving them alone and nobody is dying and they are all growing and thriving and suddenly it came to me that we are so much further down the road than I realized. So much closer to where we wanted to go when they were all tiny and we were really hoping and wondering if any of us would survive.
If you had asked us way back then where we were headed and what we wanted for our kids and our family I don’t think we could have told you. I’m not sure I can articulate even now but I know they are growing up and maturing in a way that pleases me because I think it pleases Him and it’s in part because of the hard work we put into them and all because of the work He has done and is doing in spite of us.
Not that we have arrived or anything. There is the occasional dust up over whose turn it is to clean out the litter box and there may or may not have been a smallish kerfuffle over a chair the other night. But we’re seeing landmarks that show we’ve been going in the right direction. They’re living and creating and loving and being and it’s wonderful.
As for where we’re headed? No idea. But I know it’s in front of us and we keep pressing forward trusting that He is making the path straight and leading us right where He wants us.